Curse my easily guilty conscience.

I wanna feel pretty for once. I wanna feel presentable, confident.

I hate how wide my feet are. I hate how stubby my fingers are. I hate the way my eyes look. I hate my crooked smile. I hate how big my ears are. I hate how my thighs touch when I’m standing. I hate my posture. I hate the way i walk. I hate my body. I hate how much I hate myself.

I don’t know about him anymore. It’s there, but it’s going away, I feel like.

inspirationalbullshit:

Making a list of what you want in a significant other isn’t as interesting as finding out what you can love about a person first-hand. Sure, have a general idea but never too specific. Just wait until you see who comes to you, gets thrown to you, who you chase, and who you run into yourself. You’ll know exactly what I mean. 

I believe in “going through the wrong ones to find the right one.” Because when you know as much about what you don’t want as well as what you do, you learn to appreciate each favorable quality about that person just a little bit more. 

You know what the worst feeling is? When friends of someone you’ve been dating, mistakens you for his ex (multiple times). It sucks, it really does suck. It’s not that jealous kind of feeling either, but just the fact that it seems like you don’t matter, like you’re just some kind of shadow of their ex. And it’s just plain rude. -_-

inspirationalbullshit:

I’m in love with this girl. In my eyes, she’s everything to me. Everything I need in one little 5 foot something package with long dark brown hair and brown eyes.

Thing is, she doesn’t see herself the way I do. She sees flawed, no where near perfect, could be better. Basically nothing she wishes to see. 

It’s like we’re looking at two different girls and it bothers me. It really does. Because the girl I see, that’s in front of me half the time…she really hits the spot.

She’s the type that laughs at her own jokes. The type that sings Party Rock Anthem to me like a loser when we’re cruising around town. She smothers me with attention when I look the other way until I give in. Whenever we’re in bed, she scoots her body closer to mine so I can keep her butt warm. And when my back is facing her, she’ll kiss my shoulder and it literally sends a tingle down my spine. It’s not as bad as when she digs her nose in between my shoulder blades because that tickles the hell out of me. The part that sucks is that I’m not even ticklish.

That’s why she’s special to me. No one else may ever understand why. Even if I wanted her to, I don’t think she would. But there’s a reason why she hits the spot when no one else can. Because she actually does hit the spot. For some reason, my body gets weak and vulnerable around her. And I’ve taken that as a sign. A sign that I love her. With every bone in my body, I love her. I don’t know if it’ll ever make sense enough for it to convince anyone else. But who else needs convincing when I already know so. 

She’s my goofball, my weirdo, my beloved girlfriend. I don’t really plan on that changing.

Ha…sometimes, I wish she could see what I see. Maybe then, she might even fall in love with herself. But she’s already taken, so…

Too bad.

It’s been 3 months and there’s still not a day where I don’t think about you. I can never stress it enough how much you meant to me, how much I loved you like a baby sister. It’s still tough without you here. I miss you dearly, more than anyone can imagine. Take care baby girl. I love you so much. Rest in peace.

I’ve been screwed over one too many times, and I’m tired of it. Let’s hope this time is different.

lilytrang:

A part of me will always miss you. A part of me will always love you no matter how many time my heart denies it, my love will be there. A part of me will always come back to you, but every other part of me will learn to live again because I’ve learned to live without you once. I’ll be able to do it again. You’re just a fragment of my heart.